The Great Equalizer

 As a teen growing up in the 1970s, I went to a lot of rock concerts from Bruce Springsteen and Styx to Foreigner and Tom Petty to Kansas, Queen and many others. Back then there was little access to rock stars. There was no following them on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram. They made very few appearances on television outside of The Midnight Special or Don Kirschner’s Rock Concert. Most news about rock stars came through magazines like Creem, Circus, and Rolling Stone. Consequently, rock stars were treated as . . . well, as rock stars. They were lionized, placed on pedestals, and lived larger than life in the minds of most fans.

For instance, graffiti in London in the mid-1960s proclaimed about Eric Clapton that “Clapton is God.” John Lennon of The Beatles stirred controversy when he cheekily stated in March 1966 interview that The Beatles were “More popular than Jesus.” Led Zeppelin’s lead singer Robert Plant was proclaimed “The Golden God.”

 

Fast forward four decades, and many of these rock stars are still touring. Several years ago, Jergel’s Rhythm Grille in Warrendale, brought Lou Gramm, Foreigner’s lead singer, to town, and we happened to get tickets. Before the concert began, I went to the Ladies Room, and as I left, I had to pass through a vestibule and glass doors to get back into the main room. And guess who held the door for me? Lou Gramm. When I got back to our seats, I told my husband about it and laughed that had that happened 40 years ago, I’d have been delirious, but now he was just an average-looking middle-aged man, and I just said thanks.

We saw The Who about five years ago, and although Pete Townsend didn’t jump as high while strumming his guitar and Roger Daltrey laughed about how his voice would probably crack when he screamed on We Don’t Get Fooled Again, the concert was great. 

In 2019, Phil Collins came to town. He can no longer play the drums for health reasons, and on the big screen with his glasses and bald head, he looked like my dad singing In the Air Tonight. But Phil still had it and made the concert fun and amazing.

Rod Stewart came to town a few years ago too. Everyone in the crowd had a good laugh, when on the big screen, the cover of a Rolling Stone issue with a picture of him in 1978 appeared. It was published when his song Da Ya Think I’m Sexy came out. He quoted the article back then where he said he didn’t want to be in his 60s and still singing that song. It would be ridiculous. He laughed, and said, “Guess what, I’m 72 and I’m singing it tonight.”

This past October 4, I saw The Rolling Stones for the first time at Heinz Field, and although Mick Jagger is nearing 80, he still strutted, posed and rocked the stadium. At one time, I looked at my husband and said, "Forty-five years ago, did you ever think you'd be in your sixties and watching Mick Jagger still performing?" 

 The view from the cheap seats.

But with all these concerts there was a difference from the ones I attended when I was in my youth. From Phil Collins to Mick Jagger—all of them seemed to be more humble, relaxed and happier. In fact, Mick quipped, that sadly, he hadn’t had much time to spend in Pittsburgh; he didn’t get a chance to go “to the Warhol and gaze at myself.” It’s not often that an entertainer who comes to town has a portrait hanging in a museum. But rather than being haughty about it, he seemed to be amused by it all. 

Time catches up with everyone.  These rock stars are no longer gods but mortals just like the rest of us. Aging is the great equalizer. And I find myself liking and appreciating these performers even more now that we have become acquainted with their human sides. 

This article originally appeared in the November issue of Northern Connection magazine.

#WorthRevisiting

This was originally posted June 7,  2012

Just a Thought – The Finishing Touch

 By Janice Lane Palko

Did you know that marriage is good for you? There have been many studies conducted by social scientists and scholars on marriage, and it appears that being married helps you, your health, emotional and mental well-being, finances, your children and society.

The Center for Marriage and Families at the Institute for American Values, published some of its findings about marriage in a paper entitled Why Marriage Matters: Thirty Conclusions from the Social Sciences. The institute is a nonprofit, nonpartisan organization of approximately 100 scholars from across the country and across the political spectrum. (So it’s not just a bunch of concerned moms who want their kids to get married!) Below are some of the findings:

1. Cohabitation is not the functional equivalent of marriage.

2. Marriage increases the likelihood that fathers and mother have good relationships with their children.

3. Married couples seem to build more wealth on average than singles or cohabitating couples.

4. Marriage is associated with better health and lower rates of injury, illness and disability for both men and women.

 5. Married mothers have lower rates of depression than do single or cohabitating mothers. (Those are just some of the findings. More can be found at their website: www.americanvalues.org/wmm3.)

I will be celebrating 30 years of marriage on August 28, and since I’ve racked up some big numbers on the marital scoreboard, it got me to thinking about marriage in general and mine in particular. Most scholars point to God’s creation of Eve in the Garden of Eden as the beginning of marriage, citing this Bible quote from Genesis: “’The Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.’"

Adam & Eve by Albrecht Durer

This passage of scripture has always been a bit puzzling to me. I can understand the “not being alone” part. Even if Adam had Dr. Dolittle skills, it would probably still get a bit boring just “chatting to the cheetahs” all the time. But I’ve often wondered why God thought Adam needed a helper? Setting aside the fact that he needed someone with whom to populate the earth, there really wasn’t much Adam needed help with. He didn’t have a house to clean, they weren’t wearing any clothes so there wasn’t any laundry, and as for cooking—we know they had apples.



 So what did God think Adam needed help with? Why did God think it was good for people to marry?

 I don’t purport to know the mind of God, but from my own experience here is what I think God intended when He sent Adam Eve. It’s what I call the “You’re full of it factor.”

 I had several bachelor uncles in my family whom I loved dearly, and who have since passed away. However, one of the things we noticed about them after years of their living alone and not having to answer to a spouse is that whatever they thought was gospel. When you live alone without a wife or husband to tell you, “You’re full of it,” you think that what you think is the absolute truth or the absolute best way to do things.

Dictators notoriously surround themselves with “yes men,” but that is not the case with a healthy marriage. When you are married, your inner “yes” man collides with your spousal cabinet adviser, who says things like. “How in the world did you ever think plaid shorts go with a striped shirt?” Or “No, the on-sale beer does not taste as good as Guinness.” Or “Do you really need another pair of shoes?”

There is a famous line in the movie Jerry Maguire where Tom Cruise tells Renee Zellweger, “You complete me.” As much as I like that line, I think marriage is more about “You finish me.”

If it weren’t for my husband, I’d be a lot less of a person. I wouldn’t know important things like Mel Kiper has a hairline like Eddie Munster, that Eric Clapton’s “Badge” was called that because George Harrison misread “bridge” on the sheet music and thought the title was “Badge,” that Bill Bowerman founded Nike running shoes by making the soles of his shoes on his wife’s waffle iron.

I suspect if it weren’t for me, I suspect my husband would still be wearing knee-high tube socks and cut-offs, would never know who Hugh Jackman is, and would have never heard of Jane Austin, seen Mama Mia or been to the opera. 

Hugh Jackman

When I was a kid, the Sears Christmas catalog always featured scientific gifts like chemistry sets, telescopes and rock tumblers, little machines in which you inserted dull stones and by the machine’s constant rotation and a little added grist, the rocks brushed up against each other, polishing each other’s surfaces.


 I think marriage is a rock tumbler. Two people who choose to spend their lives together jump into the rock tumbler that is life. And over years of brushing up against each other’s wills, egos, desires and personalities, you help to polish each other into the shining beautiful people God had in mind. Marriage has not completed us; it has provided the opportunity for us to put the finishing touches on each other’s souls.

Originally published in Northern Connection magazine 

I’m linking up with Reconciled to You and Theology is a Verb for #WorthRevisit Wednesday, a place where you can come and bring a past & treasured post to share, and link up with fellow bloggers!